DAY ONE: I meant to get to a computer sooner…but Canada got in the way. We started off on Canada Day in our van, The Falcon. Well, we didn’t start as early as we meant to because we decided to have one last breakfast at our favourite breakfast joint in Vancouver - Joe’s Grill on Denman. Chorizo and eggs. We get the same breakfast every time. Actually, we both tend to order the same things at every restaurant always. Combination of when something’s good, why change, and also…wait, that’s all it is. Then we drove to Golden, B.C. where we decided to stay the night and leave the Rockies for the next morning. Nothing much else to report except for the dude who urinated right outside his van, which was parked beside our van, instead of walking around the corner to use the bathroom in the restaurant he was just in and then he and his fellow dudes got into their van and did a series of unnecessary donuts around the parking lot, I have this to say: these types of things, contrary to what you might think, do not impress girls. Just sayin’.

DAY TWO: Drove to Edmonton for our first show of the tour. We saw two big animals with huge curly horns that for some reason neither of us can really say what they were…mountain goats, sheep, big horned rams, Bob and Doug?
We played at The Brixx Bar and spent an inordinate amount of time setting up the 10 thousand banners that come along with sponsorship - this will get easier. Everything with touring is about getting a routine going and nothing says routine more than putting banners up in a bar. Wicked show ensued, where we had actual people come to see us as compared to the only other time we played in Edmonton 2 years ago. Two people came to that show. One of them was a friend from Vancouver. Things are 100% looking up. We slept in the van at a Flying J - touring is just that glamorous.

DAY THREE: Drove to Regina. Stopped, got an oil change, bought Death Star inflatable beach balls and a foamie to add to the back because sleeping in a van is not always, err, comfortable. We got to O’Hanlon’s, ate, and waited for the RoughRiders to beat the Lions. The bar became packed - a literal sea of drunken green people. We were a little, uh, thinking that it was gonna get weird. And it did, but in a good way. From amongst the green surged a crowd that were there to see us. So, cool, thanks, Regina. We slept at a Husky gas station.

DAY FOUR: Drove to Winnipeg. Stopped for lunch at a restaurant where I ordered a chicken taco salad and Becky ordered a chicken wrap. They got my order wrong and I had to re-order my taco salad. The waitress then asks me what salad dressing I wanted on it…salad dressing? On a TACO salad? I couldn’t deal with it. Becky saved me by suggesting to her that salsa might work. We got our meals and as it turns out, my chicken taco salad was chicken, iceberg lettuce and tomato…the exact same ingredients that were in Becky’s wrap. So basically, we had the same lunch. We got to the Lo Pub and got to our room and got clean - yay. Another great show - the evil plan of trying to get people to spread the word about us seems to be working. Evil. Pure evil. We also got to drink because we weren’t going anywhere and that was nice. And the food was good. We split a kimchi noodle bowl and passed out about it.

DAY FIVE: We drove to Kenora, ON. Got a hotel - big treat - for two nights as our next show is in two days. And that’s where I am right now. We’ve watched non-stop reality tv shows - tv is so much better when you’re on tour. In fact, it’s the only time either of us even watch tv. And scene.